Why I take my Coaching craft so seriously…
By Leigh Ann Errico
I want to tell you about why I take my craft of Executive Coaching so seriously.
When I was 33 years old, I was thrust into a very uncomfortable situation. I had been working in the Human Resources department of a major pharmaceutical company. Most of my work involved strategy and project management and operationalizing the necessary things to optimize the company.
The work was pretty intense and high-level, and I was clocking in a ton of hours. Being recognized as a hard worker – a warrior – was my badge of honor. That perspective had been instilled in me by my parents, who always worked very hard to provide for me and my siblings … and it fit with the culture I was emersed in. It was pretty common for me to leave the office at 1 or 2 AM, go home to sleep (which often felt more like a nap), and then return to the grind at 6 AM. I’m sure I was probably sleepwalking through the hallways at times, but I was proving something I thought I needed for myself and others. Deep inside, I suspect I was also desperate for confidence because nobody was helping me out in the mojo-boosting department. Living through that time, however, gave me confidence that I could achieve great things and that no pile of work was too daunting for me to tackle.
My efforts got noticed, and through a reorganization, I was appointed as a Vice President of Human Resources for a global organization. I’ll admit now, as I did then, that I didn’t have the experience for the job. In fact, I actually tried to talk my boss out of giving me that big of a promotion! My boss laughed it off. He wanted me in there because I had demonstrated what he needed: a serious (borderline pathological) work ethic, accountability, and attention to detail on everything related to people. He was there to show me anything I didn’t know how to do from experience, and he knew that I would do whatever it took to learn from him so he wouldn’t have to teach me twice.
Of course, many peers and bystanders didn’t see me as ready for the role, and they weren’t shy about letting their feelings known. The back-channeled commentary that made its way back to me was, well, unsettling. Imagine me, already frightened of failure, inexperienced and otherwise lonely in a new job, and being sniped at by a snarky peanut gallery. I’m sure there are a few scars and some PTSD from the transition period as I moved into that role and got my sea legs. Imposter syndrome is very real, but so is faking it ‘til you make it. I discovered I was a great actress, but more importantly, I found that competence and hard work are the unfailing antidote for naysayers. Turning those opinions around and gaining the respect of almost everyone I worked with more than made up for the rocky emotional start.
When the time came for me to depart the organization (a decision I made with the birth of my first child), I leveraged that sense of capability and the belief in myself to launch LAeRRICO & Partners. For nearly twenty years, my firm has been my arena to exercise my work ethic, continue to learn about my field of expertise, and help thousands of leaders I get to have as clients reach their potential without the sense of loneliness and struggle that I went through.
Still, sometimes I ask myself, “Did it have to be so damn painful?” In some ways, I’m sure that I am a product of my struggles just as much as I am a product of my opportunities. In other ways, I wonder how much more I could have accomplished or how much less painful it would have been for me if I had known then just a few key lessons that I know now.
What my experience has taught me
From the other side of fifty years of age, the keys to the kingdom are not so difficult to understand. A few of the more important ones are:
Avoid the trap of trying to boil the ocean. Pick a few strategic objectives at a time and methodically pursue those goals with intention.
Ignore your naysayers. Focus on doing your very best every single day. It is imbued with the power of the wind and water that can bring down mountains. Even the most stone-faced critic will turn to dust in the face of undaunting optimism and effort.
Set Boundaries for yourself around work and life—not as an escape from work but as the recharging that you need to do your best. I learned this lesson while training for marathons: walking for a minute or two may slow you down now, but you will make up 10 times as much time during the rest of the race because you have the energy you need.
Sleep! No matter how big your paycheck is or how lofty your title is, you are human. Every human functions the same way, and our immune systems and cellular energy sources respond negatively when stress is constant. You have to take breaks and shift out of fight-or-flight mode, even if just for a short time, to keep your mind, body, and soul from degenerating.
Seek out and find a group of admirable colleagues as your advisors. Good people will respect your effort and want you to succeed, so they will help you navigate the tough stuff that inevitably happens. You need only ask.
Decision-making is important, and trying to make decisions when stressed is a recipe for disaster. There’s a reason we tell people to “sleep on it,” “go take a walk,” or even “take a deep breath and count to ten.” Each of these is designed to reset ourselves into what neuroscientists call parasympathetic recovery mode, which is critical for good decision-making.
You’re nothing if you don’t have your health. Whether you take Benjamin Franklin’s advice to “eat an apple a day” or you are training for a marathon, take care of yourself. You have only one body and one life, and filling both with the right food and friends, enjoying your life while accomplishing your very best, and loving who and what you are are not just platitudes; they are the most fundamental truths in life.
When facing a challenge, breathe, consider your words, speak your thoughts slowly and simply, and truly embrace the fact every good salesperson knows: You aren’t selling until someone says “no.”
Be grateful for everything you have because there are many, many people in the world who do not have your opportunities and have not experienced your successes. That’s not to say that we all don’t have challenges to deal with, and this is a reminder to take a moment to write down three things you are thankful for. When they did this exercise with heart failure patients, those who participated lived longer and recovered more quickly. Gratitude can change lives.
When you take on new responsibilities through a promotion or a new job, consider asking to engage with an Executive Coach to support your journey. Everyone needs support to unpack whatever needs to be explored to ensure you show up as your best self.
So, two decades and two million interpersonal interactions later, I am a certified executive and team coach. My firm has some of the most highly credentialed and impressive coaches in the world. We are proud of what we offer and what we have achieved, and every day, we strive to live up to our mission of supporting leaders in every way they need to excel at their profession and in their personal lives.
When we take on a client, my team and I take that commitment very, very seriously. It is not just a business transaction; it is a binding contract with another person with whom we will have a deep and trusting relationship. Every word spoken is a brick cemented in that special foundation of trust between us and holding the space for the leader to be authentic and, at times, even vulnerable. Our interactions are a time to discuss hopes and deep fears, perhaps even work through past trauma that interferes with becoming everything the client can and wants to be. We are working with the client to edit and rewrite his or her life into the story it should be. The client’s success is our success, and our fulfillment comes when the client is ready to soar without any strings holding him or her back.
As I coach the leader, I remind myself to be what we all need — what I never had — which is unwavering, anchoring acceptance and safety in order to be truly honest and speak one’s truth. It is hard to call what I do a job because it is really my privilege and an honor, one that I am grateful for every single day.
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To connect with me or learn more about how my firm can help you, please reach out.
